Boys, Boys, Boys…

So like today we broke into a private apartment complex pool… Yah, we’re rowdy and like rebels n stuff. Anyroo, I didn’t feel like swimming but hey there was a Cosmo laying out there. So I pick up the Cosmo while I’m soaking in the glorious sun rays and Hawks is swimming about – There really is a reason I don’t read Cosmo, I mean besides the fact that I won’t pay for a magazine. Cheap Cheap!

Guy articles irritate me and there was one in there called “50 Things Guys Wish You Knew”. Okay color me enlightened and a little pissed off after reading it. So here is my version of “10 Things JellyBean Wishes Guys Knew About What You Wish We Knew” (see that? JellyBean? Cause I would never think to speak for all with a whowho as a collaborative. Also only 10 because seriously it’d be a huge post! Don’t think I won’t revisit this).

1. You may think about us more than we realize, but YES – we need to hear it. Text it, call (heeyyyy) and say so when we’re with you.
2. You may never tell your guy friends details of our sex life, but be sure to know we tell our girlfriends. “Wowzers! I love his mondo grande cawk with a side of nuts & whipped cream, YUM!”
3. I get it, asking for directions is like telling me to ask another woman for fash advice. You have me there. I’ll ask for directions, kay?
4. You like to be seduced? Really? Okay we already knew that.
5. Playing hard to get sometimes is not a way we use to scare you about rejection, sometimes it’s just hawt.
6. You may not like it if we ask what we should wear but it helps to know what you like.
7. It’s not okay to pee in front of US all the time either.
8. I know you love to hear us tell you how big your manhood is, trust us, we’re proud of the size too.
9. I would never assume that because you can’t dance that you’re not good in bed, I’d just assume you can’t dance. It’s cool.
10. Being too obsessed with our body to not be able to read our body language, is a problem, not an excuse. Fix it.

*Side Note & Fine Print Shit*

This has nothing to do with Hawks. He has a mondo grande size cawk that keeps me happy as well as being the perfect boyfriend material. kkthnx